I'm sarcastic, just in case you didn't know that.
My sarcasm makes this day that much funnier.
My husband really and truly loves me, that much I know.
My kids don't think I am the least bit crazy.
If I lived life any different, I think all three of my boys would be disappointed.
Let's go back to 2 Thursdays ago. A friend stops by our house and comments how quiet and pale Parker looks. I say, I bet you he's sick before midnight. Guess what folks? I can actually predict the future! Promptly, as if on cue, Parker comes running out of his room at 11 pm clutching his stomach, screaming for momma..."my tummy hurts, I think I'm gonna puke!" 11:02 pm...he pulls his pants down and aims his you know what at the garbage can in the bathroom. I scream for Bear and then at Parker to pee in the toilet. He gets to the toilet, still standing and pukes. Pants are at his ankles. I ask him if he actually has to pee, he says no, I pull up his pants and he pukes again. Then I thank him for being the best puker ever! Never, ever, in his 6 years on earth has he made me scrub puke out of my carpet or off the floor. He has and will always make it to the toilet or a bucket! He rinses out his mouth and goes back to bed. Friday morning brings doubt to my little light of hope that we may actually make it to the play, let alone on a bus full of 70 people! He and Emmitt stay home from school the next day, just to be sure. Emmitt had an accident in his pants with a bought of diarrhea at Grandma and Papa Olson's so we err on the safe side and keep them both home. Luckily I have a rockin' dad who is willing to stay with my 2 sick kids while we go to work. By the time supper comes around on Friday night, with no further puking/pooping episodes, we eat supper. Parker promptly pukes it up (in the bucket, next to the couch). Barrett at this point has said over and over and over that we are NOT going to the Lion King play. No way, Parker simply cannot make it, he's too sick. So I simply say, Hakuna Matata, it means no worries. I am simply willing it away, we will not be sick! I did try to sell our tickets to appease my husband. And I really did try. But I had sold all of our baby clothes and gear and had scraped up $560 for us to go to the Lion King! Friday night brings no further temp, the highest it ever got was 100.2. Ibuprofen kept Parker feeling good enough to fight against Bear that he could in fact make it to the cities and back on a bus!
Saturday morning, 4 am, I am up showered dressed and ready to go. I wake the boys, check Parker's temp, a cool 98.0, and get them dressed and ready to go. Parker is so excited to go after hearing the day before he was not going. Once me and the boys are ready I then go to wake the hubs. I let him sleep in until 5 am so that must count for something. He sits up in bed and snarls, just what? are you trying to prove? I simply answer again, Hakuna Matata! He grumbles, gets out of bed, showers and we hop in the car to meet the bus. As we get on the bus, the passengers all applaud that we made it and start wishing Emmitt a Happy Birthday! We reach our seats (that were saved for us) way in the back (by the bathroom) and snuggle in for the ride. The boys doze and play until Cloquet, where we stop for breakfast at McDonald's. We order and eat. An older passenger comes to our table and is speaking to all 4 of us, but staring right at my husband and she commends us for doing this trip as a family and that she has seen the Lion King 4 times already. As she walks away, I grab Bears arm and squeeze...trying to remind him why we really are doing this. For the boys. We get back on the bus and not 20 minutes after breakfast went down, it came back up. I moved in a matter of 5 seconds from my seat across the aisle to in with Parker and Emmitt. I toss Emmitt to Bear and grab the barf bag from my backpack and have it to Parker's mouth just in time. I shield my husband with my back as he is a "reactionary puker". When I glance back at him...well let's just say, if looks could kill I would have been dead at least 10 times that day. Parker feels fine, we get settled back in to the ride and make it to the Rosedale Mall. I quietly toss the barf bag at the Mall entrance garbage and nobody ever knew. Now, the ironic part of this is, if I was on a bus with a family who knew they had a sick kid and still chose to put him on a bus full of people and he puked, I would have given that mother dirty looks all day long.
Now the hairiest part of the whole day was the mall. 2 "big" boys in a stroller at a dressing room door at a mall, before lunch, after riding on a bus for 5 hours, while their dad tries on "Vegas Clothes" for an hour, is not the funnest thing I have ever done. And for the record Bear, you wouldn't have lasted 10 seconds doing that for me. I made it an hour.
We attempt lunch, Parker takes on bite of a breadstick and manages to drink an entire Sprite while playing at the Mall playland for an hour. He is running around, jumping, playing, acting suuuper sick! Right?! Kids are resilient.
We head back to the bus for the short trip to the Orpheum and we make it! The kids see the Lion King signs and start clapping. It was going to be amazing!
The Lion King Broadway Play at the
Orpheum.
I had managed to get my eyeliner on them straight on the bumpy bus, but the boys were all ready to see the Circle of Life!
As you can see, Parker is a bit peaked, but tells us he is fine.
We couldn't take pictures inside the Orpheum, but let me tell you. We arrived about 30 minutes prior to the show, took our potty break, and headed to our seats. We were given booster cushions for the kids, but both ended up on our laps for the majority of the play. The kid to parent ratio was at least 2:1, if not 3:1. Emmitt asked if all those people were on our bus?! 2 pm, the lights go dark and the drums start and Rafiki (the baboon) starts with her huge African voice chant and Emmitt's face was priceless. He was in total awe. I poke Bear so he can see it first hand. Parker on the other hand is chanting along with her. The man-sapenia-baba-bee-sa-ba-ba-bo. It was adorable. Once the first act was over, Emmitt asked if it was all done. And you know what, I think he would have been okay with just one act. It was that amazing!
A 3 hour play, with a quick 15 minute intermission. And only the parts of the play that were slow or an unfamiliar scene that wasn't in the Disney Movie is when the boys got restless or restful. Parker started to doze in the second to last scene, but I shook him awake to see the final act. Parker would clap throughout the play when nobody else would, but he deemed the scene worthy of clapping. He loved when the kids were riding the ostriches. And when the giant (3 man) elephant came down the aisle. The costumes, the movements, the music was all indescribable. If you ever get the chance to see it, go! If you have seen it, then you know exactly what I am talking about.
By the time we boarded the bus, the boys fell asleep until Cloquet. Bear and I got to sit and read our books side by side. It was so nice to not be driving ourselves. We reached Applebee's and had an hour for supper. We shared a glass of wine and ate our meals. Parker ate very little still, but the episode on the bus was his last and final one of the illness that hit him. We still had other passengers coming up to us at the restaurant commending on how well behaved the boys were. We were actually a bit surprised at how well it all went.
By 11:30 when pull into the Falls, we were ready to be off the bus. 11 hours on a bus, a 3 hour play, 2 hours at the Mall is a lot to ask of a 4 and 6 year old...and my 35 year old husband. Now folks, he will never admit to me (although I have heard from other people he has told) that he is glad I "made" him go and he had an awesome time.
